By Katherine Dolan
There is no greater influence on a child’s life than the influence of their parents. The same can be said when it comes to raising an athlete. Parents make all the difference in the world, just like Karl and Maria Subban did in the lives of their children.
The Subban’s raised five children including three sons, P.K., Malcolm and Jordan who were all drafted to the NHL. P.K. the oldest, plays for the New Jersey Devils, Malcolm plays for the Chicago Blackhawks and Jordan the youngest is currently playing in the Austrian Hockey League.
In 2017, Karl a retired school principal and ultimate hockey Dad, wrote a book about his parenting journey called, “How We Did It.” I connected with Karl when he was in Calgary last month for a speaking engagement at the Calgary Christian School.
Karl was generous with his time, sharing his journey, insights, and experiences. Every day this week, we will be sharing parts of his interview with topics ranging from his style of parenting, why hardships matter and how he raised three professional athletes.
As a journalist, a teacher and a parent, his words resonated with me, as I hope they do with you.
If there is one question Karl Subban receives more than any others, it’s about how he raised three professional athletes. How did he manage to raise not one, not two, but three boys who went on to play professional hockey? His answer below shows the power of community.
- This interview was abbreviated.
It takes a village to raise a child.
Marie and I didn’t do it on ourselves, so I can’t stand here and wave a flag or say I found a black box of parenting, I didn’t.
The other piece of information I don’t mind saying, is my kids make me look a lot better than I really am as a parent. No one is that good. I am still learning and growing. That’s important. Sometimes too many parents are beating themselves up and there’s no need to beat yourself up.
When we started out it wasn’t to make an NHL player.
Skating was something that I loved to do and it grew into what you’re seeing today. When P.K. was two and a half and then three and a half and four and a half and five and a half, he didn’t really love hockey as much as he loved the time we were spending with him.
People forget that.
It’s the time we are spending with our children early on that really stays with them. And so it helps to create that foundation to take off, to do the things they really like early on. It’s really, really important.
I am a grandfather now and a parent, and I believe one of the most important things we can give our them (our kids) are the basics to help them develop a skill. For P.K. that skill was skating. He became really good at it. We would all gather round and watch Habs games (Montreal Canadiens) and so he said, I want to play hockey like those guys on television. He had this dream.
So that is how we started, but I didn’t know he was going to make the NHL or have a chance until George Burnett said it when P.K. was 16 at training camp. He said P.K. would have a chance to at least play at the American League Level. That was the first time I thought he had a chance.
But you know what I learned?
It wasn’t about winning in the early years. We put our kids on teams and we want them to win. Kids are socialized to win. We want them to win. We have winners and losers that is what life is. But that can work against us.
It wasn’t about winning, it was about his development. That was the most important part.
On Monday we chat about the styles of parenting and what type of parenting style he subscribes to.